How To Flirt With Your Husband

If you want a great marriage, you need to do your part to maintain his desire for you and keep the spark alive. Too many marriages grow stagnant over time and couples who were once romantic and passionate turn into nothing more than best friends and room mates.

How To Flirt With Your HusbandKeep things exciting by flirting often with your husband and never stop!

Flirting ranges from little things you can get away with in public to full out displays that are reserved for when you’re alone. If it is a long time since you flirted with him, start with the milder stuff and then take it from there…

And if you want to know exactly how to flirt with your husband, here are 25 ideas to start you off.


Relive Your Dating Days

If the kind of flirting you did when you were dating your husband worked well for you in the past, why not go for it again? Why stop just because you’re married now? He might really enjoy a good flirt from days gone by and it’ll arouse feelings in him that remind him of all the reasons he was going out with you. Maybe there was a certain look you used to give him or something you used to say, or some way you had of gently teasing him, or gestures you’d make to show you desired him. Let those things continue once you’re married! Or resurrect them if you already stopped.


Wink At Him

If you’re out and about or around other people, catching his eye with a quick wink and a smile can tell him that he’s on your mind and that you’d love to tell him or show him your love for him right then and there if you could.


Compliment Him

Simple appreciation goes a long way. Let him know you’re happy when he did something like fixing the kitchen sink or figuring out your budget. Compliment him on his looks. Don’t go for the regular things you mention often, but come up with something different, such as mentioning that his biceps look so sexy since he started working out. If he wears something special, make sure you let him know when he looks especially good. Tell him, “you know, it always turns me on when you wear that suit” or compliment his cologne or hair.


Blow A Kiss

Blowing kisses might seem like a cheesy or childish thing to do, but it works well if you’re working on flirting with your man. You’re signaling that you’re looking forward to a real kiss and is just another way to say “I love you”.


Spontaneous Kiss

Plant a kiss right on his lips when he’s expecting it least. You probably have times when you regularly kiss him, such as when he comes in the door, first thing in the morning, and so on. But try when he isn’t expecting it, like when you get to a stop light or while you’re serving him dinner. If he looks surprised, just tell him, “I just felt like giving you a kiss.”


Unusual Kiss

Giving him a kiss in place you normally wouldn’t will take him by surprise and make him take notice. If you’re sitting next to him on the couch, kiss his shoulder or knee. Kiss his wrist or behind his ear. Best to do this when you’re doing something completely different, not only during foreplay. Touch and kissing tell him you want him and also that you like showing your love in any way you can.


Element Of Surprise

When flirting, surprise plays a fairly large role. You can do the smallest things, and if he’s not expecting it, it’ll make him happy and you can build on that. Anything nice you do that he doesn’t see coming will work, so throughout the day look out for little things you can do for him.


Grab His Butt

This doesn’t need to be a big deal, just grab his behind as you’re passing him in the hall or as he’s coming out of the shower. Try it at times when he would least expect it, and see his reaction, such as when he’s making the morning coffee or stepping out of the car. You can be pretty bold with your flirting, if he knows you desire him.


Leave A Note On The Mirror

Even if it’s just a short “I love you”, leaving a note on a mirror you’re sure he’ll use is a fun way to flirt even if you’re right there. Draw it in the steam so that he’ll see it next time it steams up. Or leave a post-it. Another idea is to use dry-erase marker—especially on mirrors that won’t get steamy, such as in the bedroom. If you like, write your message in lipstick, but you’ll have a cleaning job on your hands after the gesture!


Hide Notes

Another fun way to flirt in writing is to leave little notes for him to find as he goes about his day. Put one in his laptop case, jacket pocket or lunch bag to let him know you thought of him when you’re not around to tell him.


Jazz Up Messages

If you leave messages for your husband with instructions for dinner, a shopping list, or to-dos over the weekend, instead of just the note or list, add a little something to make it flirty. Put “xoxoxoxo” in the corner or draw little hearts. Write “I love you” at the end of the note, or plant a kiss while wearing lipstick to leave a mark.



Send texts for the express reason of flirting with him. Write something like, “I can’t wait until you get back home tonight” or something spicy that will make him smile and get him excited to see you again.


Give A Small Gift

Men enjoy getting a small gift just as much as women do. Get him a box of his favorite chocolates or his favorite pastry. Add a small note to let him know you love him, or give it just like that. Leave a chocolate on his pillow or bring him breakfast in bed.



A big part of flirting is being in a good mood. Being ready to laugh and joking around in a way that makes him laugh is another way to flirt. Be ready to tease a little and to smile and giggle at his silly jokes and sayings just like you did when you were dating.


Encourage Him To Flirt Back

Chances are when you flirt with your husband he’ll get the message and flirt right back. Let him know that you love flirting with him and love it when he flirts with you. Positive reinforcement is sure to lead to a repeat experience and keep the momentum going.


Tell Him You Miss Him

Let him know via text or email message that you’re wishing he was right here, right now. Tell him you miss him and would so much like to be kissing him right now. Tell him you’re really looking forward to seeing him later and that you’ve got something special in mind. It doesn’t matter how short or long you’ve been married, it’s perfectly alright to miss him even if you saw him only hours ago and to let him know that!


Whisper What’s On Your Mind

Tell him straight out what’s on your mind. Whisper in his ear that you’d really like to do something special to him right now and be specific. This sends a pretty clear message about how desirable you find him and is a powerful flirting tool.


Hold Hands

If you’re already used to holding hands while watching a movie or walking down the street, do something different and caress his hand or wrist with a finger or thumb. Grab his hand at times when he might not expect it, such as when crossing a street or while at a function. Just hold it briefly to give him a touch of you.


Secret Code

Flirting in public can be so much fun if no one else knows exactly what you’re doing. Having words or phrases that only you two understand means you can flirt even with your parents around, at a formal office function, or while there are kids in the room. This can be a code you started when you were still dating or something you develop and build as time goes on. You can also have secret gestures that signify things only you understand.


Dress In Private

When going out to dinner or for some special event, dress in the privacy of your room with the door closed. Make sure you look your best and wear the kinds of clothes he loves to see you in. There’s something special about him waiting for you and seeing you come out looking your best, ready for the event or night out with him, just like you did when you were dating. When you emerge greet him with a smile, a kiss and a hug. He’ll fall in love with you all over again. Flirt outrageously with him all evening to keep him hot for you.


Play Footsie

Any time you’re sitting near him is a great time to play footsie. Try it when you’re out for dinner or at a family gathering. Make sure your foot or leg is brushing up against him in a way he can feel and knows it’s you. If you can, run your foot up his leg a little to make him squirm.


Skin Contact

Let him feel skin on skin. It can be pretty exciting to feel skin when you’re not really expecting it and he’ll feel the same way. Let your leg brush against his arm while you get up from the table or brush bare arms while walking side by side. Cuddle up to him naked in bed if you normally wear pjs.


Let Him See Skin

Don’t slouch around the whole day in sweatpants. Wear clothing at home sometimes that “accidentally” lets him see bare skin. Oops, a button on your shirt is undone and he can see your bra underneath. Or wear a low neck shirt and make a point to bend over so he can see everything. Wear skirts with a slit or a mini so that he gets a glimpse of thigh or stocking top as you cross your legs. Though he probably gets to see you naked all the time, it’s the unexpected that makes those little glimpses hot.


Go Bare

Go without underwear and make sure he notices at a time he’s least expecting it. Brush his arm with your breasts in passing as he’s sitting and watching TV or doing finances at the dining table so he knows you’re not wearing a bra. Or wear a short skirt and make sure he knows you’re not wearing anything underneath. If you’re feeling really daring, and know he’ll be coming home alone, greet him at the door in nothing but your apron. You could even go commando sometimes when you’re out and let him know at some point. Whisper in his ear that you’re not wearing panties under your long skirt.


Build Anticipation

Talk dirty to him at a time when he wouldn’t expect you to have something naughty on your mind and when he can’t do anything about it …until later. It builds great anticipation. While he’s on the phone with his mother whisper “I would really like to have you right now” or while he’s getting ready for the day, tell him “you know, I just undressed you again in my mind”. Romance doesn’t always have to be about flowers and sweet nothings, neither does saying naughty things only work if a man says them. Be bold from time to time in order to keep things exciting in your love life and have him thinking about you all day.

Over to you: Do you have any tips about flirting to keep the spark alive? Please share in the comments below

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10 Responses to “How To Flirt With Your Husband”

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  1. What fun! It’s wonderful to continue the romance for years and years.

  2. Irene Soh says:

    Wow! That is a really comprehensive list on how to flirt with your husband. I totally agree that we should flirt to keep things alive!!
    Irene Soh recently posted…Busy Mom Guide to looking Fabulous (Minimalist Version)

  3. K. Lee Banks says:

    I just saw your blog link posted in the Facebook UBC group and had to come read the list! 😉 I actually do SOME of these things, but not all. It’s funny, because hubby and I were just discussing how we’ve been together for 11 years and about some of the things we USED to do –and all this came about because he saved all our first emails back and forth, after we met in person the first time following a month of online dating communications! Thanks for this list! Can’t wait to work on some of them!
    K. Lee Banks recently posted…May Do-Over: Dangers of Procrastination

  4. I love your list! My favorite thing is to have my husband leave the house, go dress somewhere else, then come and pick me up for a date. It’s as if we’re still dating.

    It’s very important to keep romance alive in a relationship and you’ve covered quite a few ways to do this. Glad to know I’m doing some of them. 🙂

  5. This is a great list! I have been texting my husband little messages throughout the day and I love seeing his messages to me at unexpected time.
    Rabia recently posted…Stages of Motherhood as Told Through Movie Titles

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