An interesting little (or in this case big) conundrum, in a video I came across on YouTube this week from the Smitten girls Simone and Ariel.
What should you do if you get drunk and end up kissing another guy though you love the one already have?
A difficult question indeed! Should you be honest and tell your guy you slipped up and apologize for the error of your ways? Should you worry about what it means for your relationship? Should you always be honest, no matter how much it might hurt the other person?
The advice from Simone and Ariel is that there is no one right answer.
It may mean that the relationship needs to end because you have shown that you are not fully committed to it and have given yourself a ready-made excuse to end it.
But that’s not always the case.
Sometimes you get swept up in the moment and what you did, despite appearances to the contrary, has no bearing on the quality of your relationship.
It’s up to you to evaluate which of those options it is, and it’s a good idea to take a long hard look at your relationship and how it’s going, in any case, so you can take corrective action if need be.
- Is there something missing from your relationship?
- Are you still excited by your guy sexually?
- Is he still attracted to you sexually?
- Are you angry about something that you haven’t quite acknowledged? Were you “paying him back”?
If none of those things are a problem, and it was just a slip up, the girls advise not telling your guy. Avoid trying to put your guilt on his shoulders.
Wear your big girl pants and deal with what you did yourself. Repent and move on. It’s not fair that he has to carry around the image of you making out with someone else in his head forever more. It’s not worth telling him if it was not meaningful.
Keep an eye on things to make sure this remains a one-off incident that evaporates into history and that there’s no underlying dissatisfaction that continues to grow. If you start to sense that there is something lurking there, you may need to re-open the issue and deal with it then.
Here is the video if you would like to watch it.
Over to you: Do you think this is good advice? Please share in the comments below.