Being single is not some kind of disease you have to find a strategy to cope with, but if you’ve been looking for love for a while, your single status can feel like something you’d rather do without.
You wish your mother and your friends were not quite so “helpful” in pointing out that it’s about time you did something about it, and you would like someone special to share your life with, but in the absence of Mr Right, your single status is something you have to learn to live with (at least for now).
If being single feels like it’s something you’re enduring here are some coping strategies that work to beat the blues as well as ones you want to avoid like the plague. You can learn how to be happy single!
Enjoy Your Life
You have total freedom to do anything you like at least as far as having to consult or consider a partner is concerned. So make the most of the time you have to do exactly what you want with your life and free time. Make your single life the best possible life you could live on your terms. Don’t wait for Mr Right to come along to make you complete – make your life complete yourself. Mr Right has a happy knack of coming along for those with already full lives. Decide how you want your life to be, with or without a guy and live that life.
Get Out More
Mooching around at home is isolating and depressing. Get out and about and make new friends of all kinds especially if most of your friends are happily paired up. Don’t assess everyone as a potential partner but as a potential friend. Humans are social creatures. You need people in your life. Of course, the more people you meet, the more places you go, the more likely you are to bump into an eligible partner too. No idea where to go or what to do? Try 182 Best Places To Meet Men. These places are not just full of great guys. They are full of friends you haven’t met yet.
Instead of waiting for a partner to take care of you, treat yourself as the most precious human being on earth. Look after your diet, your fitness, your health. Pamper yourself with great treatments even if they are the low-cost kind you apply yourself from the drugstore. You are important. Your health and well-being are important. Treat yourself that way.
Boost Your Confidence And Self-Esteem
The feeling that no one wants you can eat away at your self-esteem but it’s absolutely untrue that you’re unwanted – you just haven’t met any of the multitudes of potential partners who would love to have the chance to share their life with you yet. Work on your confidence because the more of it you have, the better you feel about yourself and your life. You’ll not only be happier in your single life but also more attractive to others. The better opinion you have of yourself, the more worth you have in the eyes of others too. See How To Be More Confident In Three Steps
Dating a guy just because it feels better than having no one is cruel and dishonest. Don’t lead anyone to believe they mean more to you than they do. It’s not a recipe for feeling great about yourself. Also, friends with benefits might feel like a good idea in the short term if you miss sex or even just human contact, but you can easily end up falling for a bedtime buddy who feels nothing for you in return and get badly hurt. Single and heartbroken is not the aim here.
You may opt out of finding a partner altogether because it seems too difficult to put yourself out there. It makes you feel vulnerable and so you start saying “no one looks at women over 40” or “all the good guys are taken” or “online dating sites are full of liars” when really it’s just fear talking and holding you back from having love in your life.
Becoming Too Close To Friends Or Kids
If close friends or kids fulfill all your emotional needs, it can be harmful to your chances of developing a new romantic relationship. Fears about being vulnerable may mean that you deliberately avoid spending a lot of time with a new potential partner and it leaves no opportunity to create any kind of deep connection.
Excuses that you can’t neglect your family and friends are really just fear talking. Of course, friends and family are important to us all and especially to singles, but don’t let these relationships become all consuming so that you no longer have a need for romantic closeness if you would really like to find love.
Numbing yourself by losing yourself in work, comfort eating, TV, alcohol, compulsive shopping, gambling, drugs or any other unhealthy behavior is not going to help you at all.
These are just ways of distracting yourself when reality gets too scary. They stop you having painful feelings for a time, but you really need those feelings to work out what you need to change in your life. And generally it’s not just finding a partner. There is something else going on stopping you feeling good about your life. And unless your life is good, why would a partner want to join you in it?
Over To You: Do you have any tips for singles? What are your favorite coping strategies? Please share in the comments below.