If you’re in love with each other, chances are you just know that when he tells you, he actually means it. You love him. You trust him. You’re absolutely ready to believe him when he says those three little “I love you” words.
But if you lack faith in your own judgment, or you don’t quite trust what he says, there are some signs that can help you decide whether he truly means it when he says he loves you.
Why would he say he loves you and not mean it?
He may blurt out those words at the wrong time or be saying them for the wrong reasons just like you (see When NOT to say “I Love You“.) Perhaps he thinks you expect it and he’s worried he’ll have to deal with your emotions if he doesn’t say it. He might be saying it, because he wants you to sleep with him, or because you just did.
In the video below compiled by YourTango.com, several experts give their view on how you know if he loves you. Here’s what they have to say
- If two people are in love, they make it abundantly clear that they are in love. There is never any doubt about their feelings for each other.
- He should tell you that he loves you, but actions speak louder than words. If he loves you, he will show you in small meaningful ways that he’s trying to make you happy.
- It’s not about the obvious trite gestures like sending flowers or bringing chocolates. But love is shown in the details. If he loves you he will take care of small things that make you happy day after day, for example choosing places for dates that will suit you, like booking a date in a steak restaurant if you are allergic to seafood
- If he loves you he will ask you what you need, before he tells you what he needs, and he will try to please you even if what pleases you is of no importance to him. He shows unselfishness in doing things for you that do nothing for him, and that he would never do for himself
- You know that someone loves you by the level of attention, care, interest, support, investment shown.
A few of the experts would question whether he loves you if you have any doubt about it. We all have preferred communication styles, but when we love someone we do communicate it in many different ways. If you are not feeling loved by him, it’s likely that you are not. The exception to this is if part of you doesn’t believe he loves you because you don’t think you are lovable, and no one could really love you. Then, no matter how much you are loved, you might need constant affirmation.
If you would like to see the video yourself, here it is
Over to you: How do you know that your current partner loves you/ How did you realize that a former partner didn’t? Did you just know? Please share in the comments below.
I’ve been married for 40 years, and I dated my husband for four years before that, so it’s been a while. And I truly hope I never have to go through the process again. I think we just knew – we started as friends and it slowly became more. (I think your experts are right for the most part, too.)
Alana recently posted…Why Isn’t This Your Average Urban Tree?
It’s lovely that you just knew Alana. Thanks for sharing.
Ana recently posted…Third Step To A Great Relationship
This is great information – and it’s so true that actions speak louder than words. Thank you for sharing!
Laurel Regan recently posted…Today’s Gratitude List – Linkup No. 36
Thanks Laurel – sometimes even the experts seem to agree with common sense. It’s not always the case 🙂
Ana recently posted…Three Things For Friday
This is similar to conversations I have with the partner. Loving someone is more than just saying the words – you gotta show it too. If you know it bothers your wife to leave your clothes or shoes in the middle of the floor for someone to pick up or trip over — then put them in the hamper or place the shoes at the door without being told.
If you walk past your plate 10 times to go into the kitchen, what is stopping you from carrying the plate in there with you and placing it into the sink?
How about the toilet seat? Love me enough to put the dang thing down so I don’t fall in during the night when I gotta use it? ROFL
It’s the little things that mean a lot!
Thanks for sharing Bonnie. I think that toilet seat thing is an issue in every home, definitely in mine with a husband and two sons LOL. Sometimes we forget that there are probably as many things we do that annoy them, and how much we’d miss their annoying little habits if they were gone.
Ana recently posted…21 Things You Must Know Before Buying An Engagement Ring